My New World has Begun !

Yup ! My New World has Begun.
New school, new friends, new uniforms, unfortunately old spirit !!
I want to face everything with the biggest smile I ever have !
But you know, the same things always happen. The old things !
I always cry, feel bad !! I'm so paranoid to face the truth !
To go to school . Even to think about it ! I hate school . I want to go !
I don't even want to remember that the things ever happen to me ?
I don't know why . I'm just so scared to face it !
I'm scared to realize thet my friends think that I'm a freak !
Am I ? am I a nerdy ?!
Why "school things" always in my mind ?!
Why I can't even enjoy it ?! It's been 3 weeks since I move here . But why I'm not feel comfortable enough ?! why my heart just cannot accept it ?!